If you don’t have anything nice to say…
Having severe acne can be bad enough without being forced to deal with comments made by other people. Unless you have bad acne yourself you might never realize how insensitive other people can be. Although some folks might be well meaning, there can be a distinct lack of empathy for the condition. You can bet that a person with bad acne already knows what their face looks like. Chances are you won’t be helping by offering comments or unsolicited acne tips. Sometimes it’s best to just say nothing, and that doesn’t mean you have to ignore the situation completely either. Be there for an acne sufferer if they want to talk about their problem, but otherwise keep your mouth shut and think about somebody else’s feelings. Here are some things you should never say to a person with severe acne.
1. What happened to your face? Believe it or not, many people are insensitive enough to let this question slip out of their mouths. Sometimes it is out of genuine curiosity since they really don’t know that it’s acne.
But use some common sense, and realize that even if you aren’t exactly sure what is happening on someone’s face, it is incredibly rude to point it out. If it is severe acne then nothing “happened” to their face. They are just dealing with a condition that is not their fault.
2. Why don’t you pop your pimples? Not only would saying something like this be unwelcome, it is also faulty advice. A person with severe acne can make their condition much worse if they were to pop their pimples. Furthermore, such an action could lead to the more complicated problem of acne scars.
As a method of unclogging pores, popping pimples is never a good thing to do, and what makes you think that someone with acne hasn’t already thought of it?
3. You should wash your face more. Acne can have a variety of causes that have nothing to do with how often a person washes their face. There can be genetic or hereditary factors that lead to the formation of severe acne. Ironically, people with bad acne probably already have excellent washing habits. They probably wash better than you do and with more expensive facial washes and acne products. If it were that simple they would be enjoying clear skin already.
People who stand out from the crowd often have to deal with being different. Acne can certainly make a person more noticeable in addition to saddling them with a variety of preconceptions. All any acne sufferer wants is to feel like everyone else. So try to put yourself in their shoes and imagine how you would respond to certain comments. A little empathy goes a long way, and it will surely be appreciated by someone who has to deal with a very difficult problem.
Try to put yourself in someone else’s shoes when you encounter them. They have probably gone through a tremendous amount of embarrassment and some people avoid society altogether. You don’t want to give them another reason to stop going outside or socializing.
Acne is a very personal thing that affects everyone differently in slightly various ways. But one thing is for sure, sometimes you can doubt yourself or think that it is a reflection on your personality. If you really want to help someone it’s best to ignore the problem unless it comes up in conversation. This doesn’t mean you have to deny the problem exists but chances are the acne sufferer is already self-conscious about the situation.
Highlighting it can make things more awkward and get them to concentrate on the look of their skin than anything else. Anything you say after that point will probably fall on deaf ears. It’s very difficult to stand out from everyone else and you need to understand what it feels like to be in this position.
Try to be supportive as possible and never blame anyone or accuse them for acne itself. They likely already do that and it’s not a good thing to exacerbate the problem. It’s unfortunate can’t look like a beautiful actress with great skin, but sometimes that’s just the way it is.
Acne sufferers can be tremendously sensitive about the situation on their face. While it might seem rather unusual to have to watch what you say to such a high degree, sometimes there is no other way. So choose your words carefully and try to think what it would be like to have severe acne yourself. Imagine having a mask that you can’t take off the comes with so many preconceptions from other people. It’s very difficult to fit in and finding times when you do can seem like a miracle.
If you can provide friendship or even a little bit of solace to a complete stranger and it might be enough to make their day. People going through acne treatment have to deal with a heavy emotional component that can cause a tremendous amount of mental drain. Everyday tasks can seem extraordinarily difficult and simple social actions can be completely joyless. It’s essential to remember that even one comment can have a tremendous negative impact so try to empathize is much as possible. With any luck, there will be a permanent solution for acne one day but until then it’s necessary to be sensitive about the problem.
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